Happy New Year!

It’s 2013! I’m excited to have a new slate upon which to write a new story. With God’s help and guidance I believe it’s going to be the best year of my life.

I rounded out 2012 by spending it with my family in Livingston, Montana and ringing in 2013 under the Big Sky. The landscape in Montana is mighty different from the landscape in the Northeast.

This New Year’s Day I drove down to the lagoon at Sacajawea Park as the sun was setting. While standing by the statue, “At the Yellowstone,” named so because that is where the Corps rested and watered their horses after crossing through the Bridger Mountains earlier that day (July 15, 1806), I was awe-struck while pondering the reality of life over two hundred years ago. Sacajawea is the Shoshone young woman who joined the Lewis and Clark expedition.

Montana is very cold in the winter. Most of time I’m indoors but still dressed in layers of winter garments. I’m never very far from the heater. For trips outside in frigid conditions I’ve got on a hat, a wool scarf, my Land’s End Buckskin gloves and usually, my daughter’s Bog’s boots (warm, waterproof and comfortable).

I can only imagine how cold it was for the travelers on the Lewis and Clark expedition. It reminds me how brave Sacajawea must have been to travel by horseback with the band of soldiers and the warmth of a campfire at night.

One way I can honor Sacajawea and other’s before us who braved hurdles and challenges that led to a better life is to step out of my comfort zone.

After leaving the lagoon at Sacajawea Park I drove up the road a smidge, parked, and got out and walked alongside the Yellowstone River. In the silence with only the sound of the rushing waters lapping over rocks and flowing downstream, I let the experience fill me. Breathing in deeply even in twenty-five degree weather was invigorating. I then exhaled and let go of my cares.

As I walked back to the warmth of my daughter Nicole’s Jeep that I was driving, I felt encouraged. As I begin writing a new story on my empty slate all will surely not be peaches and cream. But whatever 2013 drops into my lap I know that God will grant me what I need to brave the hurdles and challenges.

Happy New Year! May it be your best year yet too!

Holiday happenings in Montana

Eight months have passed since my last visit to Montana. Usually my visits are closer together, but this year I’ve been evaluated for a kidney transplant. Doctor’s visits and tests during the evaluation process interrupted life’s flow and put any travel plans I wanted to make on hold.

At my last doctor’s visit with my nephrologist I learned my kidney function had slightly improved and I didn’t need my transplant in December, as had been discussed. I was elated. That meant I had a window of opportunity to book a flight to the Treasure State for Christmas with my family!

So, December 14, I flew out of Newark, New Jersey to Big Sky country. My daughter, Nicole, and four-year-old grandson, Finn, came to pick me up in Billings. They arrived shortly after my plane landed meeting me in the baggage area. I was facing the luggage carousel when Finn came bounding up to me with his auntie following. Leaping into my open arms he gave the most endearing and enthusiastic greeting “Grandma” I’d ever heard melting my heart on the spot. The hug that followed instantly erased the months of waiting I’d agonized over at not being able to visit my family.

It’s now several days since my arrival, and I am sitting in a comfy chair next to the wood stove at my daughter Lesa’s house, writing this blog. I’ve been sleeping out in “the cottage” at the back of the property across from the chicken coop. As dawn breaks two plump hens softly cackle outside my window. Sometimes, Finn comes out to tell me, “Grandma, time to get up”. I don’t know when I’ve been so happy!
Each morning on the way into the house for my morning coffee, I open the hen house door to gather the eggs. I’d not had that experience since I was a young girl staying overnight with my great-grandmother, Flora May Swofford. It was as fun in 2012 gathering eggs as it was in 1955.

Being a grandmother has got to be the most wonderful experience in the world. Every grandmother is keenly familiar with the unbridled joy and thrill of watching grandchildren grow. And, of the incredible manner these little tykes have of communicating what’s on their minds. People told me how great it is being a grandparent but one can’t really comprehend the mystery and magic until they are one themselves.

And now, as I’ve settled in for the duration of my visit with my daughters and family I’m savoring each day and each interaction with Finn, the little guy, and his big brothers who afford me blessings of their own.

I find life truly exciting at this stage in my life. Everything becomes an adventure. This trip has even been one of further discovery as I’ve learned more about myself and my family. Christmas morning will surely bring further blessings as we celebrate the gift the birth of Christ brings!

A phone call of hope

A phone call that I missed this morning got my attention. On my iPhone dial I saw that it came from area code 212, New York City. I recognized the number as coming from Columbia New York Presbyterian Hospital University Medical Center. The phone call could only mean one thing. The results were back. The type and cross match that is done to find out if a potential organ donor is an actual match was completed. I would soon learn if my potential organ donor is a match for me to get a kidney transplant.

My story began thirty-five years ago when I was diagnosed with polycystic kidney disease, PKD for short. PKD is one of the most common life-threatening genetic diseases that eventually destroy healthy kidney tissue. There is no cure. The only hope of survival is dialysis or transplantation. My journey to transplantation began exactly one year ago when I was placed on the United Network for Organ Sharing (UNOS) waiting list.

Eager to know the type and cross match results, I returned the call to Columbia only to reach an answering machine. I left a message. It turned out to be several hours after the first call came that I actually learned the result of the type and cross match. While waiting, I was busy baking snickerdoodle cookies for a friend who was bitten by a dog. Since everybody knows cookies are a version of first aid, I wanted to take over some freshly baked cookies and a box of tea to cheer her spirits.

My Aunt B. always says to me, “Keeping singing, Jen.” So, I started singing while baking the cookies to help take my mind off the urgency simmering in my stomach.

A short time after I took the cookies out of the oven, I tried Columbia again and this time was connected with my transplant coordinator. The long awaited moment was at hand. I was sitting on the edge of my chair, pen in hand and paper in front of me ready to write down the results.

“Your donor is a match”, I heard my transplant coordinator say.

My phone call of hope had come! The transplantation process would continue and a kidney transplant would be scheduled at my donor’s convenience. My mind was whirling as I listened and scribbled the next steps I had to take. After we hung up I could hardly concentrate. I began calling family and friends who had been praying for me to find a living donor. My family couldn’t believe it happened so soon and were overjoyed from my good news. They were astonished by the way everything had fallen into place exactly one year to the day of being placed on the waiting list.

I was overwhelmed with gratitude to think that someone was even willing to be tested regardless of the outcome. It’s going to take some time to process how the donor will change my life and mine will change hers. But, I’m going to take it one day at a time. Today, I’m celebrating the good news about getting a preemptive (bypassing dialysis) living donor kidney transplant.

My mother used to tell me that my blessings weren’t from “luck” but from God’s hand upon me. Mom passed on a few years ago but I think she was right. It’s not really luck at all; it’s the faithful prayers of my family and friends who have stood with me claiming God’s promise to care for me. Today, he showed His faithfulness and love and care through a phone call of hope!

Until next time, Jennifer

I hope you will come back and visit my blog again and share it with your family and friends.

Celebrating your value

This afternoon after parking my Jeep to go into our local farmer’s market, a tall grandmotherly looking lady crossed the walkway in front of me. I was slightly taken aback from the sight of her. My eyebrows darted up and my jaw dropped as I focused in on the paraphernalia on her head. A pink, rubber curler with a band that clasped at the end to secure it was dangling right smack at the top of her forehead where you might typically see bangs.

Even more surprising was that the smartly dressed lady pushing her grocery cart seemed oblivious to the curler in her hair. She appeared caught up in her thoughts and her demeanor was of a woman on a mission.

It reminded me how vain I have been at times. I’ve been so caught up with my appearance that there were times in my life leaving the house without my lipstick on wasn’t an option. Even the simple chore of taking out the garbage required hair fixed and make-up applied.

Silly, isn’t it? Who we are doesn’t change because of external factors.

Ironically, a few months ago I completely surprised myself by driving to Newark International Airport without a stitch of make-up on and without my hair perfectly coifed. A very dear friend who’d I’d not seen in seven years was arriving on a late flight. Therefore, I decided the sensible thing to do was shower, wash my hair, and cleanse and cream my face before leaving for the airport. That I could even do that revealed I’d come a long way in my journey of life from exercising vanity to knowing my value. It was the latter that gave me the confidence to not worry what people thought or how I might appear. I intrinsically knew that my friend loved me and accepted me whether my lipstick and blush were painted on my face or not.

The funny thing is, when Cheryl and I became friends forty-two years ago she had long dark hair that she wore in a braid down her back, and I had long reddish brown hair. When her plane landed I had drifted back in time with my thoughts to the good ole days and was almost expecting to see that person I remembered from long ago with the dark hair. She was almost expecting to see a redhead. We both almost missed recognizing each other. In reality, Cheryl’s hair today is short and curly, and is a beautiful shade of silver white. And, I am blond. When we did spot each other and embraced we were laughing at ourselves and crying as a myriad of memories engulfed us from days gone by. It was tearful yet joyful reunion.

Maybe I’m more like that grandmother with the curler on her forehead than I thought. You reach a certain age and what people think just doesn’t matter. Life teaches you to find your courage, walk with grace, and embrace the day with a smile!

Please revisit my blog from time to time and share it with your friends and family.
Until next time, Jennifer

Celebrating autumn

Autumn is here. The days are getting shorter, the weather is crisper and the leaves are falling. What a perfect time to renew my faith and stand in my belief that good things are in store. Spring brings newness of life; autumn brings the harvest of how we’ve lived. The fruit of our labor comes into focus. It’s time for celebration!

Let’s get out the pumpkins, the cinnamon and spices for pie, and let’s light the hearth and gather 'round. Celebration and community give us excuses to flourish within our soul as well as to embrace our moments at hand.

The older I get the more I believe that the best is yet to come. And, it starts with today. Today is the day we have to rejoice, forgive, laugh, embrace, nourish and give. Even though life may be askew, we can still be filled with expectation for what the season will bring forth. Family matters, medical situations, diseases, financial challenges, loss of jobs, broken relationships and other trials affect our lives but we can still anticipate goodness. Blessings are bound to come. When they do, I pray that I won’t be so buried in defeat that I miss them. I pray for eyes to recognize that along with the autumn harvest God has a plan of bounty for me and for you.

Therefore, we can celebrate autumn with abandon and let our joy abound. It’s contagious and I can’t think of a more wonderful way to welcome autumn and this season of harvest! Sometimes, there are even welcome surprises of celebration and blessings.

I hope you will share my blog with your friends and family and revisit soon.
Until next time…Jennifer

Social graces

Sometimes I’m happier when I abstain from watching the news. The senseless murders, the abduction of women and children, car accidents resulting in loved ones’ deaths from distracted drivers and all the other atrocities displayed across the screen, is beyond disheartening. But, the last couple of days I’ve lazily indulged in lingering over my morning coffee in front of the television. Surely, my blood pressure would be lower if I picked up my knitting rather than listen to the dispatching of crimes and meaningless nonsense over the air waves.

For instance, yesterday on ABC’s, The View, Barbara Walters was rebuking Her Majesty the Queen for her ‘sour face’ and dressing ‘like something out of the nineteenth century’ during the opening ceremony for the Olympics. While I didn’t agree with the Queen’s selection of accessories (black gloves, black handbag and black shoes) for her pink dress, I am appalled by Ms. Walters blatant bashing of the Queen’s attire. What in heaven’s name is to be gained from her dreadful diatribe?

My blog readership may be miniscule but it is an forum for self-expression and right now I’m so provoked if I don’t take advantage of this outlet and express myself, I’ll pop!

While Ms. Walters acquiesces that Her Royal Highness has a sense of humor she also criticizes her unsmiling face during the segment of the program when a children’s choir sang ‘God Save the Queen’. Yes, I too would have thoroughly enjoyed seeing the Queen smile approvingly while the children performed but we are not privy to the Queen’s thoughts. Her stoic face may not have accurately reflected her sentiments or what was in her heart. As much as we might insist we are all knowing when it comes to what others are thinking, the truth is, all we can legitimately do is speculate what’s on another’s mind.

The distress I feel over the commentary from Ms. Walter, who I have faithfully watched and admired down through the years, is from her lack of tact and unforgiving manner towards the Queen ensemble. What’s happened to the art of executing eloquence and respectfulness in our conversation whether we are speaking privately or in front of a national audience? My mother taught me that if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all. Didn’t we all grow up with that adage?

Several years ago I was introduced to the talk radio world as a “social commentator”. Perhaps my job is not done. As long as I can speak and type I pray that I will use my words honorably.

This morning’s indulgence of watching TV has rekindled my passion for keeping good citizenship alive. We have no control over other’s conduct or conversation and while we may feel let down by their behavior, more important is not letting my own self down from my conduct or conversation. Change begins with me. One person can make a difference.

With God’s help and influence, I will continue striving for excellence in my life so that my words and actions are edifying to others.

It’s been a good day. I hope to help make it a better tomorrow by keeping my own social graces intact and above board.

Thank you for visiting my blog. I hope you’ll revisit it from time to time and see what’s new!

My friend, Maxine

Maxine makes me laugh.

You know Maxine… she’s Hallmark’s cartoon character created in 2003 by John Wagner (yes, Maxine’s creator is a man) who speaks up for the older generation. She’s everybody’s favorite Crabbinista. With curly hair and various hats that she wears (I knew we had something in common) she is usually plopped in a chair with her chin resting in the palm of her hand and a besmirched expression on her face peering out from behind dark sunglasses and spouting off about some infraction. Such as, “I tried getting AWAY from it all. Most of it FOLLOWED me.”

But, Maxine speaks up and since my passion is teaching people the principles I’ve learned for speaking up for yourself (though still in process myself) I couldn’t resist referring to her in this blog entry.

Last month I had a birthday and received a small package in the mail from my Aunt B. who lives on the West coast. Aunt B. is known for her thoughtful gifts, so I couldn’t wait to open her present. It was a little book, Maxine Flips Out! Everyone’s Favorite Griper shares her signs for the times. Within moments of reading the quips I was in stitches laughing at Maxine’s practicality punctuated with petulance.

Initially, one might not think of Maxine as being practical. However, “Reach for the STARS! It keeps your CHEST from sagging,” is one of her sayings in the little book from Aunt B. See what I mean. Practicality personified!

At this stage of my life with being evaluated at Columbia University Medical Center for a possible kidney liver transplant and driving in weekly for patient education meetings, and doctor’s appointments for this and that test, I need to laugh. Often and out loud and with good belly laughs.

I've been taking my friend, Maxine, with me into New York City and is helping me to do just that.
Since I just celebrated a birthday I’ll end this post with one of my favorites, “Age has its ADVANTAGES. Too bad I don’t REMEMBER what they are.”

Please share my blog with your friends and check back again for what’s new! As always, your comments and thoughts are welcome.